Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
is it fun? or sober?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
