I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
