Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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