There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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