oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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