Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
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Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
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I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
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