Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
