that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
