I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
