i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
