Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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