Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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