yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize