never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize