butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Randomize
