uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
