ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
