I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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