I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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