Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
