he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
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You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
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That accounts for only three of the penises
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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