He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
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