if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
