I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.