It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
So. Much. Porn.
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