Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
