oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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