jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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