Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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