The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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