even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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