Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
