we have pet lesbian snakes
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
