and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
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It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
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We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
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