People in love make me want to vomit
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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