well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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