I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
So many bounce houses so little time
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize