one might say we're banned from that church
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
dude. I can hear the air.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
