i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Randomize
