its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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