I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize