"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
