i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
