I just made out with a guy for $7.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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