they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
