so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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