Having a random hookup so left but love u
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
