Whod you bang
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
