do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
