Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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