and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
